Oh help

Fuck.

First of all.

Fuck.

Second of all.

Fuck.

Third of all.

Fuck

Fourth of all.

What the fuck.

I hate these nights.

Learning a new language, drawing. Writing. Listening to music. Rarely talking to someone.

Alone.

I hate it.

____________

The quiet owl.

As it roams it stays quiet, afraid to disturb others.

Swiftly roaming the forest rarely stopping to find something to eat, or some other animal to converse with.

As others roam past, none stop. All leave as if it's just an obstacle to overcome.

Just another pothole in the road.

Just another twig on the ground.

Just another ladder for some superstitious fellow to find their way around.

As many past, many are skeptical.

The owls does nothing but sit.

He does not know why people do not give him a chance.

He's not going to bite.

He's not going to peck.

All he would want at most is for you to pull the thorn out of his side.

For you to save him from the one thing that is causing him pain.

It effects him and every step he makes.

There once was another owl.

One that made him fly!

He didn't roam around when he was with the other owl.

The one they call sissy.

The one that they all think of as spectacular.

The one that can bring a glow into the deepest depths of earth.

Owl met sissy.

He did really find himself at home when he was around sissy.

Too bad sissy didn't feel the same, and to sissy.....well...thankfully the owl wasn't just some little ditch in the road.

______

Reality is a bitch.

All you ever need is just a little bit of loving.

I want a girl to call my own.

Not literally.

Just some special someone I can see myself being with a for a long time.

Someone that I can watch TV with.

Someone I could draw pictures with.

Someone that I could play video games with.

Sigh.

Goodbye and goodnight, blog.

I

Can't have what I can't get and want the most.
No one knows that it is though! >:]

I hate this feeling.

Such a hopeless feeling.



Time will tell what happens though.

So...

That one girl that liked me, I guess I got her really upset.

I ignored her for a day, and now she's mad. I think... Lol.
I felt really bad at first, but then it got to me that I couldn't handle. Being called every day, always wanting to talk almost every chance. It felt like I was being pulled away from everything to...TALK...on the phone with this person.

I don't like them anymore. They are immature and are probably talking shit like most people.

The Diamond

From where we begin, to where we end.
Obstacles are overcome.
Problems are dealt with.
When after death, what does it all matter?


The Aureole.
It wants to you, it feeds off of you.
As you chase it, it leads you away.
When we find our diamond, we feel the most ecstatic.
The diamond is somewhere to be hidden, lurking underneath it all.
Where can we find it? Such elation is brings to one's life.

Like a man and his child, his pride and joy.
What he finds before his child.
His diamond.
The way a dog and his bone are.
The way a boy and his toy truck are.
The way the little girl and her doll from birth are.
Heart brings the truth.
Heart brings it all out.
Heart brings the diamond.
You do not believe you have heart when you really do.
Everyone has a bit in them.

The diamond was once read to me as a lost rock in the sea by a good friend.

I see my diamond, I just cannot reach for it yet.

I love.

I love my best and close friends.

I'd do anything for them.

I love Matt and Heather. -Insert Happy Face-

They both are such great friends that cause me to smile all the time.

Happiness is pulled away from me once again.

I have feelings for this certain someone.
I had feelings for two certain someone's to be exact.
One was lost yesterday when I found out how stupid she is.
It is a harsh way to put it.
When a certain someone does certain things to make them "feel good," there is a certain extent you can go to make yourself feel good. When you do things such as inhaling certain fumes, which is unacceptable, and just a way to destroy your mind. I lost almost what little feelings I had for this person.

The other, well this person is amazing, she is one of those girls, probably one of those only girls that I will ever get to say "She had me at hello."
The first time I saw her, I felt so shy to say anything.
I really do like this girl.

But she isn't looking for a relationship, which probably means that means no no for me asking her out. Knowing that made me really sad. I really really liked this girl, she was so perfect in every way. She's a girl where she could brighten up the room with her smile in a second.

I really like her still.

I just feel so confused.